She is beautiful. He is strong.

 

My commitment as a growing mother and as a learning parent is to facilitate my sons to grow into beautiful spirits who know to share, care, love, and most importantly respect all beings around them. I think that whether it is a patriarchal assignment of a female or a hierarchically enrolled task of a male, both should be learned by every kid.

The whole notion that boys are supposed to be strong and girls are meant to be pretty is debatable in my belief. The adjectives shouldn't be followed by any specific gender. I often see questionable eyes when I tell them that my son adores playing with the kitchen set. My question to those eyes is why should a color rift or task division be embodying a particular gender? A girl can have blue as her special color and a boy can enjoy pink. A boy can love his teddy and a girl can idolize racing a bike.

I'm sure you will concede that gender neutrality and gender equality are something we have to bestow to our kids.

They say genuine learning commences at home and, in my view, in the case of growing kids… preaching should be and must be preceded by action. I and my husband have been consciously trying to do balanced parenting from the very beginning. Why is it that the mother needs to change diapers or bathe the child? These routine tasks can be very well divided among mother and father. It just takes some common sense.

For any bigger and better change, a gradual change in mindset is a prime requisite. The transition needs to take place at a grass-root level. E.g. I willfully watch the words spoken by myself to my kids. Sentences like "Boys don't cry" or "Don't be like a sissy girl" are a big NO. If my boy wants to vent his emotions by shedding some tears, I don't think there is anything wrong with that. Men can and do cry. It is a basic human emotion. Why make such a fuss over it!!

Sometimes when a girl child is very smart or very outspoken, people think of it in a very cynical way and at times recommend their parents to induce some sanskars into her. I don't see what is immoral with that. A girl can grow up to become the CEO of a company. A CEO has got to be very smart and outspoken, then why to teach girls to be submissive.

This Gender Neutral parenting is my attempt to keep my kids off from gender stereotyping. Research has shown that while both genders have biological differences, a male and female brain has no differences. The focus is on treating the child as a single human being and respecting her/his individual preferences and choices.

“It is time that we all see gender as a spectrum instead of two sets of opposing ideals.”- Emma Watson

The goal should not be to erase gender, but to encourage children to look past gender norms, and pursue all interests, careers, and hobbies. By making sure their opportunities and choices are not restricted by gender, we can administer a gender-neutral and mutually respectable society.

However, there’s a fine line between observing a gender-neutral approach and forcing it as a rule. I am hoping that my kids will appreciate that gender is not some criteria used to segregate between people, and one can choose a color to wear, toys to play with, skills to learn, and friends to make irrespective of their gender. Fingers crossed!!!

So it is a must requirement that I should edit and add to the title of this blog- 

She is beautiful and strong. He is strong and beautiful…or do you suggest any other apt title to this blog?