Book Review- The Art Of Saying NO by Damon Zahariades

 

Nooooo!!!

This book with its lengthy title is a mini-summary in itself.

The detailed title of the book is - "The Art Of Saying NO: How To Stand Your Ground, Reclaim Your Time And Energy, And Refuse To Be Taken For Granted (Without Feeling Guilty!)"

The two-letter term “NO” is sometimes the most difficult one to pronounce with strangers and strangely… effortlessly uttered with loved ones. And if I may explain, the effect of this NO is variedly distinct. With strangers, the hardship in saying “no” leads to a wastage of time and energy while with loved ones, that “no” leads to fractions in relationships and emotional distancing.

I hope you get the sense.

The point is to evaluate if we are being used as a "professional doormat" for our easy-going attitude of saying “yes” or termed as "a people-pleaser" for rarely saying “No”.

Our “priority” should be the key in deciding “Ney” or “Yey”.

This book provides a step-by-step, strategic guide for setting boundaries and developing the assertiveness required to maintain them. Despite not agreeing 100% with the author, reading this book helped me to understand the act of saying NO from various standpoints and I... kind of... appreciate that. Because for me, NO means NO. I’m not going to waste my time trying to convince you that my answer is acceptable. You don’t have to approve of my decision, your only role at that time is to accept it and move on. It’s pretty simple, honestly (with all due modesty and sincerity, of course).

So, if you want to read this edition, browse it like a thoughtful reminder for establishing priorities in life, how to deal with circumstances of decision making with people and if you're looking forward to attaining new words/ways of saying a "No".

Quotes from the book of my likings (a kind of spoiler-alert)

"Consider how flight attendants explain airline safety to passengers. In the event the cabin decompresses, you’re supposed to put on your oxygen mask before helping others put on their masks. Help yourself first. Then, assist others. These instructions aren’t intended to promote self-preservation. Rather, the airline knows that if you help others first, you risk succumbing to hypoxia. And that would prevent you from helping anyone."

"The fear of missing out (FOMO) motivates many of us to say yes, even when we lack the time, energy, or money to do so with confidence. Say no in every situation, at home, and in the workplace, according to your convictions."

"No one will protect my time or prioritize my needs as vigilantly as I. That’s understandable. Most people act out of self-interest; they naturally put their priorities ahead of others’ priorities. But it means each of us is responsible for making sure our personal needs are met. No one is going to do it for us. But allowing your needs to remain unaddressed while you continuously cater to others is the path toward resentment and bitterness."